several march twenties

one year, i collected flowers
but the trick of it was that
they all had to be alive at the same
time to count as Part Of The Set,
but they needed cut stems as well
(so many rules) and so yes, they had
to be dying, but with the color and scent
of exhales, and the motivation
of industrious artists--somehow,
my collection consistently mattered;
i think because it was temporal and
tragic and had the assured destruction
of a mural, of a deep sea fisherman's net,
of a freshly knit pair of baby boots.

march twenty-first and twenty-second time

during suicide, the body tries
to escape. crumbles out little
tangible bits of self like fairytale
trails: blood, tissue, and bile. the body leaves
the soft taupe waiting room of the skin
when the doctor--the pulsing filter of the heart
like the routine scrawl of paperwork--
finally diagnoses,

stands, waltzes

out.

he is the problem; he is the disease.

almost-a-week-in-mid-march-time

one of my favorite things is that my kitten is discovering windows--
and I get to watch her do it, and I hope that it makes her happy
and not sad

march thirteenth fourteenth fifteen time

This is my medical record page 253

cracks and snaps like hideous
thrift store buttons: my wrist
thumbs and riddles about
like a rhythmless inebriate
clicking to the sore beat
of ineptitude; but seriously,
how much hurt is too much?

march thirteenth time

today's holiday is
if-the-world-were-made
-of-feathers day.

tomorrow is books-
on-your-head day.

and then?

march eleventh and twelfth times

Every time she clacked her tongue
a horse hoof did not hit the ground--
she stole the sound--the animal, short
one foot, cried... and stumbled forward
as it died!

march seventh, eighth, ninth, and tenth time(s)

Best part about being an eyelid: for half of the day, you get to be completely immersed in dreams.

Worst part about being an eyelid: for the other half of the day, you are submerged in almost total darkness. You have moments of respite, but they are blurs of color and shape with very little tangible meaning.

march sixth time

laughing when you mean to cry might be the worst
possible thing. that nervous giggle indicating heart-
wrenching anxiety: eliciting that feeling that yes,
the being human thing, you are doing it wrong
(and perhaps you will always do it wrong)
(and it is conceivable that you have always
done it wrong)

(and the wrong inhabits your voice / your breath /
it sings during funerals and weeps during births

march fourth and fifth time

prediction of snow on a warm march night

When the sky is white like this,
it reminds me of calcium deposits
on fingernails. Someone has punched
the universe too hard, and its insides
are pouring out like impatient
spring flowers.

march second and third time

My number one goal right now is to sing in the shower more frequently.

This is not a poem, but this is a significant truth.

February twenty-eighth and march first time

at the nicest hotels,
room service menus
include what people
really want: pillow
fights, fort making,
marshmallows roasting
over a flame bubbling
enthusiastically with
agenda items. I cannot
imagine the bill, the staff,
or the length of stay--
I can only envision
this jubilant inner child and
a real possibility of escape
within the system; by the system.